opted out of my 140 midterm in the end.... at like 730 this morning... after studying for it all night yesterday.... oh well. thought i shoudn't take it cos i had no confidence in aceing (sp?) it and taking it would defeat my purpose of taking it... to save my first midterm grade... had better work hard and do well for finals else face the consequences.... =( feeling very slack today, though i have so much coming up..... why why. oh well. but at least i am not depressed or antying... haha. dunno why i keep reminding myself that these days...
supposed to do a mini assignment for R and C today... to look for examples of 'free indirect discourse' in the novel i am reading.... aargh. dunno what it even vaguely looks like. it's amazing how there are so many different forms of narration that i am not even aware of...

my totally unexpected 2 min of fame?
found myself on our berkeley newsletter...
and if anyone is interested, there are more pics on this other group member's website
am panicking real bad for my econ 140 midterm!!! aargh. dun want to fail..... yet keep procrastinating! aargh.

just returned from jacqui and sumei's church production not too long ago..... and it just got me thinking how creative and multi-talented all these ppl were... and though it kinda made me make comparisons again.... thinking what limited stuff i am capable of... but no i am not depressed... =)
SMSA elections today also made me aware of a mild change in my thinking i suppose.... now that i look back at elections last year, i think i really had self-esteem too low for my own good. on hindsight, i think i would have learnt a lot and probably had a lot of fun had i ran and got the post of secretary... so when i got nominated today, though i know that i cannot possibly do it this year, it made me think "what if...." not that i regret anything, just that i somehow became aware of my change in mindset perhaps recently.... i hope i am getting a lot less emotional and irrational....
i think i am still sometimes upset about my inability to ''get'' things sometimes.... for being quite dense sometimes.... but i am trying to improve.... and i hope i eventually do...