i feel schizo again. suddenly feel very depressed and xian for no reason today. actually i suspect i know the reason but just feels eeky. i think when u are in ur little world with no one to compare to or no one to upset your 'equilibrium' you can get on forever feeling fine. and so in class today i felt really upset with nothing to contribute to the class discussion and the fact that the class only had like 12 ppl or so exacerbated it. and wrote a not so good paper for class today. and have another response paper due tmr morning. dunno what to write. feel like i can't write well enough. cannot analyse things properly. am getting paranoid that i have no topic for my research paper... thinking about old problems... imagining new probs...