and so bush won. no one is happy... wonder what my instructor will say later. went to his house last night supposedly to blog about elections but everything was still unclear so ended up just sitting here watching CNN... his house is really big and cool and just filled with artistic objects, tapestries, books etc which show how travelled he is... how cultured he is... and the overall decor was just lovely.... wonder if all the houses along solano look like that inside. made me wonder if one day i will have the chance to own a house like that... and grow to be as cultured and worldly like that... in the presence of two other grad journalism students yesterday i just felt really really ignorant and bad... =( yet i dun really know what to do with myself. i sometimes really admire ppl who aren't so directionless... who always know what they want and work hard towards their goals... i think i'm forever searching for things i like... sometimes aimlessly... and i think what if i go dc and screw things up... or what if i dun enjoy myself there and yearn for ppl to fall back on... sometimes i think i am strong but actually i'm very weak... schizo me.