a dream

had a really strange but somewhat symbolic dream which left me wondering all morning what action i should take.... dreamt that I was just walking across this bridge at night and there was like dim yellow light shining on me... was alone on this bridge and was then walking down the long flight of steps... feeling somewhat precarious as i sometiems do (though it seems strange to many i guess)... then i came to the end of the flight of steps and there suddenly was a window... and to get to my destination (or wherever i was going) I had to step out of the window to walk down another flight of steps... now this flight of steps was like just by the sea, adjacent to some big mass of water and it was like windy and the water was rough and choppy and i had to walk down the steps... and there was no railing or anything.... and i was feeling really scared and hesitant.... sadly while i was deciding whether to take the risk and end up dead or something i was woken up by my faithful cell phone alarm... and as such i was teetering at that moment, wondering how i should go about doing that but never made any decision..... oh well... really food for thought?? much as i would like to find out what would have happened to me, I think now i can never ever find out.... and perhaps it's just to alert me that there might be something in my life that I ahve been thinking about, or tried to decide upon but havne't done so?? perhaps my dream has drawn on my deepest fears while i have been unaware of my inner emotions all this while.... haha ok or maybe it was just a random dream... i mean though ppl and self-help books always talk about the power of dreams etc etc i guess we also have to take it with a pinch of salt?? haha but i dunno why but i just feel that my 'inner self' is trying to tell me something... i need a consultant...
this dream also inspired me to draw something.... and come up with a whole new art piece about my emotions and stuff.... feel really excited.. but i think i would never get down to doign it though.. cos if i really want to do it it woudl take a lot of time and researching for pictures, to do a really good job. and i guess ever sicne my O level art piece i never ever embarked on any such projects anymore... guess not whole-heartedly either.... quite sad. maybe one day... =) i think i am still sporadically bothered by my "inadequateness" in my studies... getting depressed over being 'xun se'... that i never really really like thought about spending say one whole school week not doing work and doing something i really like.

would like to get such interesting dreams more often though. =P it's been long since i rememebered a dream so vividly....